Saturday, January 16, 2016

Let's Play Values-Ball!

When Candidate Cruz accused Candidate Trump of having "New York values," Trump wrapped himself in the sacrosanct cloak of 9/11, triumphantly telling us, "I was there."


To be frank, we were not aware Candidate Trump had been a First Responder - and if so, we hope he gets his lungs checked regularly - but the Pundits seemed to love his response.


Even those Republicans who are native New Yorkers - I was born in Brooklyn (Yay, me!) - think we understand what Candidate Cruz was saying and that it had nothing to do with our essential patriotism.


To many Red Staters - and quite a few Blue Staters, too - New York is thought of as: the home of Wall Street (which we don't like); the  home base of the Mainstream Media (which we really don't like); and the province of rude cab drivers (whose concept we don't like, even if we haven't encountered any).


New York is also thought of as the stomping ground of  Limousine Liberals who have gazillion-dollar Manhattan penthouses; gazillion-dollar mansions in Westchester; and rent other gazillion-dollar homes in the Hamptons for $100,000 per week, or what many Americans live on for 5 or 6 years. (Oh, wait! That's only Hillary Clinton.)

Nevertheless, since his New York values statement has been so controversial, we strongly advise Candidate Cruz to link any future values statements to locales which have far fewer defenders.

He can talk about Uruguayan values: Soccer players who bite other soccer players on the shoulder . . . . .


Papua New Guinean values: Nobody cares for headhunters . . . . .

Liechtensteiner values: Because it sounds funny . . . . .



Or Tuvaluan values: Since there are only 7 Tuvaluan-Americans all told, and they all live in New York, anyway.




(A curious side note:  In one of the weirdest Fox News segments ever recorded, newscaster Geraldo Rivera maintained that attacking "New York values" meant one was being anti-Puerto-Rican, anti-Semitic, or anti-newsmen of half Puerto Rican/half-Jewish ancestry. Of which there are approximately one.)



















 

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